Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Busy Schedule.

I've been unbelievably busy this week and it doesn't look like tomorrow will be any better.  This is why my posts have been crappy lately.  I got a few jobs to go to, and then some other problems to deal with that I don't like to talk about on my blog.  So I apologize if I haven't been following everybody's blogs as closely as often as I'd like to.  Work should slow back down in a couple of days and I'll get back to the usual routine though.  In the mean time I'll leave you with some work related humor.


When you have an "I hate my job" day try this:

On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the
thermometer section. You will need to purchase a rectal thermometer
made by "Q-tip." Be very sure that you get this brand. When you get
home, lock your doors, draw the drapes and disconnect the phone so you
will not be disturbed during your therapy. Change to very comfortable
clothing, such as a sweat suit and lie down on your bed. Open the
package and remove the thermometer.

Carefully place it on the bedside table so that it will not
become chipped or broken. Take out the written material that
accompanies the thermometer and read it. You will notice that in small print there is a statement:

"Every rectal thermometer made by Q-tip is personally tested."
Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times,
"I am so glad I do not work in quality control at the Q-tip Company."




 Work vs Prison

IN PRISON... you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.
AT WORK... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.

IN PRISON... you get three meals a day.
AT WORK... you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it.

IN PRISON... you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK... you get more work for good behavior.

IN PRISON... the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
AT WORK... you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself.

IN PRISON... you can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK... you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON... you get your own toilet.
AT WORK... you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat.

IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family.

IN PRISON... all expenses are paid by the taxpayers with no work required
AT WORK... you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.

IN PRISON... you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.
AT WORK... you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.

IN PRISON... you must deal with sadistic wardens.
AT WORK... they are called managers.

So why is it, again, that we work?

32 comments:

  1. Busy days can be a bummer. But I'm glad I don't work for Q-tip.

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  2. I bet the prisoners are the ones personally testing the rectal thermometers. XD

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  3. We're slaves either way. Just depends on whether you want to feed yourself or be fed.

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  4. lol, I always enjoy thinking of the prison/job comparisons. sad huh...

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  5. Ahhaha that's hilarious! Makes me love my job!

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  6. lol too bad this brand isnt available here in germany

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  7. IN PRISON: You must wear the same jumpsuit everyday..
    AT WORK: you must wear different clothes everyday.

    LOL

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  8. HAHA quality control at Q tip sounds funny.

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  9. You should all listen closely to what Prison Mike has to say.

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  10. I love your "I hate my job" tip. Made me laugh! Well I hope you get stressed less and everything gets calmer for you in the coming days. :)

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  11. my prison is a job, my job is a prison

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  12. After this I can say I love my job underpaid...

    Maybe go to prison isn't bad idea...

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  13. I lol'd sooo hard at the Q-Tip bit. Did you make that up? That is gold dude xD.

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  14. Same here. At my place of employment we are getting ready to push a revolutionary site out in the medical field. Things have been getting stressful.

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  15. Man I did not expect that Q-Tip part haha so glad I don't work with them!

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  16. busy days suck, its cool dude, we understand

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  17. lolol i love that first one.

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  18. I hope everything de-stresses soon. I'll be looking forward to new posts.

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  19. Haha this is hilarious! Thanks for sharing! Also Thanks for recent support!

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  20. Sounds like a great case for unemployment lol

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  21. Lol I'm considering going out and getting arrested right now :P

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  22. "I am so glad I do not work in quality control at the Q-tip Company." x5
    Nice post. ;)

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  23. haha I loved the comparisons!

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  24. you're screwed when work = prison :(

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  25. the day mixed prison existe im in

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  26. I've been lacking on my blogspot activity recently too. I have to work an extra 10 hours a week for the next two months to support the new apartment I just got.
    Feels bad man.

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  27. Just want to stick in a comment to say don't be afraid to take a 5 minute break sometimes, when you're busiest the shortest breaks can be the best.

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  28. The whole work/prison comparison is way true.

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